Little Drummer Girl

Tenley got a new bathtub drum set. She really likes to drum and thought it was just perfect that she could drum and take a bath at the same time!

Have you noticed how many toys make hideous amounts of noise these days?

Happy New Year

Tenley and I spend a quiet New Year's Eve at home while Mommy was at work. The biggest change in Tenley this past year has been her language development. Along with that has come the negotiation skills. This part cracks me (and Tenley) up on a regular basis. Take tonight for example: Tenley loves her chewable vitamins and is constantly asking to have one. I keep reminding her that they are only taken once a day and she has already had hers for today. She can have another one tomorrow.

At this, she smiled at me and said "Okay, have two!" I laughed again and told her no it's only one a day. She looked at me and finally said, "Hmmm, okay just one more." Then she laughs like a loon and we both crack up.

Another example comes from the anger department: today she got mad about something with her train and she picked up the whole set and threw it across the room. After I told her that her actions were totally unacceptable and that if she continued to throw her toys in anger we would throw them in the garbage, the tears really started. In between the sobs came "no throw toys away...pease no throw away." It was really cute and I had to remember that I was trying to explain that this was not good but I was also trying not to laugh at her.

She really is the most amazing little person. I can't wait to see what 2007 will hold for her and I can't wait to continue seeing life through her eyes.


Happy New Year from Jeff, Michelle and Tenley!

Happy Birthday Kim

This is Kim. I met Kim back at the end of March because she and her son Jaxon previewed & joined Gymboree on the same day Tenley and I did. Tenley was immediately drawn to her because she’s Japanese and to a 1.5 year old an Asian is an Asian and Kim seemed nice and looked familiar to her. As a bonus, she had Jaxon and Tenley loves little boys.
So Kim and I talked and traded phone numbers and set up play dates. We got insanely lucky: Tenley and Jaxon genuinely like each other and enjoy each other’s company…and so do Kim and I.

In the past 9 months I have learned that Kim loves to knit and is quite an accomplished knitter (I got a cute little magenta clutch for Christmas & she’s knitting Tenley a sweater). In this respect I have also learned that she is foolishly optimistic because she is trying to teach me to knit…this may be why she shares my love of margaritas. She loves animals, likes Thai and Mexican food, shoes, make-up, and should not be left unattended in Nordstrom. She’s great fun to talk to, and as a NoCal transplant she can tell me about places I vaguely know, and some I’ve never heard of but might now like to see. Kim majored in fish and volunteered at the Monterey Bay Aquarium. We both love to travel, eat, shop, watch movies, and occasionally escape our children. In a wonderful and bizarre twist of fate, we both married geeks that get along famously.

30 years ago today, Kim was “gifted” to her parents. In 2006 she was my late birthday present. I desperately wanted a Mom friend to hang out with and kvetch about Tenley to on the bad days. I wanted Tenley to have a friend to play with. In all the parenting books and magazines they make it sound so easy: just go hang out at your neighborhood park every day at the same time and you’ll make a friend! But I found it didn’t work that way, and I prayed very hard for a Mom Friend- and my prayers were answered- I got Kim.

We both have Forever Friends: people like Aunty Meg who have been in our lives forever and hold their own special untouchable place (partly because they know too much!) and who are more family than friends. But now we also have each other- a best friend who understands why you’re describing the contents of your child’s diaper in detail over dinner and thinks nothing of it.

Happy 30th Birthday Kim! Thank you for being my friend.

Mucho Mouse

It’s been a banner week for Tenley: Disneyland 3 times in 2 weeks. First there was the Disney Family Christmas Party last Tuesday. It was, by far, the easiest of the 3 visits owing mostly to the fact that it was capacity controlled and there were no waits for anything.

Last Sunday we met up with three other families from our China travel group for our annual trip to D-Land to celebrate our girl’s birthdays. Normally we go in the fall (when all their birthdays actually occur), but due to scheduling conflicts we pushed back to December. Considering it was a Sunday during the Holidays, the parks were less crowded than I expected. Still, getting around with four 2 year olds, a 4 year old, a 5 year old, and 1 nine year old is like herding cats. Add to that the fact that Jeff and I were late and we spent 20 minutes playing “marco polo” on our cell phones trying to catch up with the group. We were able to get on several rides and saw one of the parades over at California Adventure; but mostly it was just great to see the girls together. It’s so amazing to see how much they’ve grown and changed- and yet are still the same kids- they have a special bond that transcends their time apart. Plus I really love seeing all the families.
Favourite moments from this trip include Gaynor overhearing 2 women in the Monsters Inc. line eyeing our little group of 5 seriously Caucasian adults, all the Fortune Cookies, and 1 blond haired biological child, and whispering “…I don’t know. Well, some of them must be adopted…” Gee, ya think??? There were also the 2 women in line for Dumbo (appropriate) who asked 1) were they all adopted? and 2) were they related? What- like someone had given birth to quadruplets and each family took 1?? Gaynor & I laughed so hard we almost shot Diet Coke out our noses.

Then Kim talked me into going with she & Jaxon on Wednesday. There really wasn’t any arm twisting involved: Ten loves it and I know what a drag it is to go by yourself. Uncle Kev signed us in and we took the kids to the Playhouse Disney Live show which they both seemed to enjoy in their own ways… Jaxon sat there in wide eyed wonder with his mouth hanging open in awe, and Tenley bounced off the walls and spent most of the show trying to put streamers from the confetti canons on my head. The rest of California Adventure was a bust: missed pictures with the Mouse, Monsters was down, rollercoaster closed, etc., but we went to Land and hit most of Ten’s faves. Kim wanted to ride Pirates, and the line was short, but I think Tenley would prefer to skip that one next time- she spent the ride clinging to me for dear life and burying her face on my shoulder. We arrived at Small World just in time to see all the lights come on, so I got a picture:


After that we rode Buzz Lightyear, bought a balloon & some goodies from the bakery and called it a night.

My most interesting moment in the day came when we sat down at Carnation Café for lunch, and Tenley went into her usual don’t-want-to-sit-down-& eat! Must-bounce-around-and-want-to-run routine. I wasn’t in any mood to deal with it, so I very calmly and very sternly told her that even if she chose not to eat she must sit down and behave or we would not ride Dumbo. She looked at me with huge eyes as if trying to discern how serious I was, and I guess she knew I meant it, because she sobered quickly and sat still and ate her lunch! Hmmm! We’re starting to grasp actions & consequences! Score one for Mom.

It was a good time, and we enjoyed seeing the pretty lights and the reindeer… but if I don’t see Anaheim before March I think I’ll be ok. April would be ok too.

Turkey, Monsters & Santa- Oh MY!

It’s been a busy couple weeks around here.

First there was the fabulous Turkey Day feast at Don & Betsy’s. In keeping with our cruise, we ate our weight in food. There was all the usual- the bird, the potatos, rolls, stuffing, green bean casserole, veggies & cranberries; but there was also waldorf salad, a fabulous cheese plate, and a pumpkin gingerbread trifle on the dessert table. We hung out until Ten was tired and then we headed for home to lay on the couch like pythons in the sun. Jeff actually spent the whole weekend laying on the couch because it was his turn to get sick this year.



Week 1 of December was miserable: first there were the freezing winds that turned Tenley and I into walking tearing sneezing allergy-infested snotballs. It’s so much fun to try to sleep when you can’t breathe. Especially if you’re 2. Add to this Ten’s minor obsession with Monsters Inc. which caused her to figure out that bedtime = monsters come. No matter that the monsters in the movie are friendly, there was still an abnormal number of nightmares. So the Monsters are now on vacation, and we’re working to get her obsessed with something else.




By last weekend my allergies had turned into a fine head cold, so I was wrangling Tenley through a fog. Mercifully, my Mom saved me by taking Ten for a few hours on Sunday because Jeff was at Disneyland all weekend running Candlelight, which included such fun events as: a security guard having a heart attack in the middle of a show, several kids passing out, a kid being rushed to the hospital because he was having complications from an emergency appendectomy he had had 3 days earlier (what were his parents thinking??), Andy Garcia missing his cues and butchering the word “betrothed”, and Disney security refusing to let Hector Elizondo on the property.

This week has been exciting in good and bad ways. On Monday we went to Gymboree and then trotted out to Victoria Gardens to Christmas shop & have lunch with Aunty Meg. On Tuesday, Kim & I took Ten & Jaxon to the charity Cut-A-Thon my Mom’s Club was having at Monkey Dooz. We made the bold decision to have Tenley’s hair cut off into a chin length bob to try to make her thin hair look fuller…and not only did it work, but it looks super cute! Now everywhere we go Tenley flips her new ‘do at people and says “haircut”. After the excitement of a haircut we took the kids to see Santa for pictures.




Our visit to Santa went much better than last years visit. In ‘05 we got the obligatory sitting-on-Santa’s-lap-screaming-bloody-murder shot. This time she ran right in and gave Santa a hug and climbed into his lap. Then she sat there stoicly and forced the uninterested photography elf to tickle her with a feather duster until we got a giggle. I settled for the slightly demonic smile that came with the giggle.



We raced home from Victoria Gardens to pick up Jeff and change our clothes for the Disney Family Christmas party that night. We rendezvoused with Uncle Kev, Tia Lorena, & Miss Alexis for some dinner before heading into the park to accomplish Tenley’s agenda. Dinner was fine, and there was a nice Santa in front of a pretty tree in the lobby of the Grand Californian so we decided to have the girls pictures taken. Six month old Alexis sat on Santa’s lap and stared at him in wide eyed wonder while the photographer & her daddy snapped pictures. Then it was Ten’s turn. And it was a NO. Like a repeat of last year she came unglued and we got this great shot of poor Santa, freaked out Tenley, and Alexis looking at her like “What the f&%!k is wrong with you???” This resulted in the appearance of the lovey which Tenley managed to lose between the GC and Sephora. I was the only one really upset about it – I think it might have been the last lovey she had from the hotel China.



The rest of the evening went much better. It wasn’t crowded at all, and we waited no more than 15 minutes for any ride. Tenley accomplished her Disney itinerary (Dumbo, Rockets, Teacups, Carousel, Small World) without a hitch, and we even went on Peter Pan because the line was so short! (Interesting note: the 15 minute waits were for Space Mountain …and Peter Pan) Alexis & Ten both liked the Christmas Parade and the “snow” on Main Street. After Small World, we said goodnight to K, L &A and took Tenley up to the Princess Fantasy Faire to see the girls.



We found out that Mulan was trading off with Princess Minnie, so we waited for 10 minutes or so so Ten could have her picture taken with Mulan. It was worth the wait. Tenley’s whole face lit up and she ran right to Mulan and gave her a huge hug. Then she stood there smiling and shyly telling Mulan that her name was Tenley and she was 2. Mulan clued into Ten right away and asked her if she was from China too, to which Tenley proudly said “Yeah! China!”. She & Mulan traded big kisses and we called it a night.


Well, Tenley called it a night. She conked out before we reached the freeway. Sadly, Jeff and I were still conscious and stuck on a 4 lane freeway that had been reduced to one lane. Sucked to be us.

We're Baaaaccck!!

So you’ve been looking at LaFred for the better part of 2 weeks now and probably wondering if we fell off the planet. Nope. Tenley went to Grandma & Grandpa’s in Clovis and we went to Mexico.

Our Vacation

We ditched Tenley and Kim & Zak ditched Jaxon and the parents took off on a well deserved cruise. Eight days of sun, margaritas, and eating our bodyweight in food daily! It was fabulous: no one sat in our laps or wanted to walk up and down the stairs continuously, no one was forced to share their food, and we didn’t hear “no no no no nooooo!” “mine!” “share? some? some?” for over a week. However, Jeff read 4 books, Kim knitted 2 purses, Zak wrote 40 pages of fiction, and I lost track of my nap count. There were also a couple facials, a massage, a mani & pedi, 1 game of bingo, several games of shuffleboard, some sun, 2 or 3 games of gin, a giant coconut monkey filled with pina colada, shopping, and lots and lots of dessert.
The group consensus was that Acapulco was a dive, with the exception of El Zorrito which had beyond excellent food and killer margaritas (never mind that it took us 50 minutes in the humidity to walk there – our guide from earlier in the day had estimated 15- and we were only buoyed by Zak declaring “I think it’s right up here!” at every corner), Ziuhuatenauo was charming, pretty, and (surprise) clean- we would all go there again; we didn’t even bother getting off the ship in Puerto Vallarta- what with the picturesque Wal-Mart and Sam’s Club right at the end of the pier, and a good time was had in Cabo by all.
It was all over way too fast and it has been agreed that we need to do this again…soon.



Tenley's Vacation



Ten went to Camp Clovis to spend 9 days having frosted animal cookies for breakfast & terrorizing poor Charlie. Grandma Barbara says she did really well: bedtime occurred at 8:30 ish every night, an hour or so nap was taken daily, there was a consistently good appetite (despite having a cold), a new jacket and dress were purchased, the potty was sat on many times (but there was no activity), everyone else received assistance with their potty experiences, Charlie was chased, having her own slide to monopolize was bliss, a fine collection of ordinary-everyday rocks was established, she knew to tell people we were in “Messsico”, and she helped Grandma Christmas-cize the house. For the most part she had a good time, but this time she knew right away that we were missing and asked for us daily.

Grandma & Grandpa made the huge sacrifice and braved 6 hours of pre-Thanksgiving traffic to deliver her to us. She was both happy to see us and sad to say good bye to her grandparents. So we called it a success and we’re already plotting our next escape!

Sharing the Lovey

The other day LaFred was having a small nap on one of the couch pillows. She was being cute so Michelle decided to snap a couple of quick pictures. Tenley saw this and decided, all on her own, to share her lovey with 'Fred. She told Michelle, Shhhh, Fred was sleeping and then she went over and put her lovey on Fred. It's very cute.

Everyone seems to be getting along and Tenley is bonding with LaFred since they are both the baby. Now Tenley has her own cat to grow up with.

LaFred

Today I was sitting at work when my cell phone beeped. It was a text message from Michelle with a picture of a small kitty attached with a note that said “Isn’t she cute, can I have her?”

Now any of you who know Michelle knows that there isn’t an animal on the planet that she does not want to take into our house and make our pet. The easiest of these animals is the cat. We already have three cats. In Michelle’s world three, four or five…it’s all the same. While I love the cats as well, I think with three cats we were set. So I called Michelle and asked where she was. “The pet store with Kim” she replied. I immediately told her to leave the store and don’t look back. She had other ideas and started extolling the virtues of the cute little kitten she had just seen…and held???

Good grief, she had already held it before I called her. I knew then I was fighting a losing battle and my only position could be NO! I tried to tell her that three cats were plenty and we definitely didn’t need four. What if the other three don’t like her? What if she doesn’t like them? What if Tenley didn’t like her? (Okay, that was a stupid question)

We hung up with the understanding that they would leave the store. About 10 minutes later my phone rang again and it was Michelle telling me that Zack had told Kim that she could have a new cat! I said to Michelle “wasn’t it nice that Kim had a loving and understanding husband” and then told her to once again leave the store and not look back. Unfortunately she was still standing close to the cage and the little kitten was meowing loudly at Michelle. Now some of us hear “Meow, meow, meow” and it’s really cute. Michelle hears “Pick me up, love me and I will love you back and purr in your ear.”

We hung up again. Now I started to think about it and my co-worker, Allison, was not helping matters either since she is a cat person too. When next my phone rang it was Michelle telling me what time she had to work tonight and that I should meet her to pick up Tenley and the new cat. I told her absolutely not! She said ok, she would just take the cat home and it would be in the bathroom when I got there.

By this time, my defenses were low and I was out of excuses so I told her to get the cat. So like the dutiful father, I picked up Tenley at 5pm then she and I went home and played with the cute new kitty.

What can I say, I’m a pushover and a sucker for a cute face!

Kung Pow Chicken

I know we’re a little behind, but it took us a few days to recover from the Halloween festivities.

Last Sunday we met up with Doug, Tina & James; and Caryn, Tim & Hannah for the annual trip to Mickey’s Halloween Treat at California Adventure. Jeff had to work at D-land in the morning, so my in-laws politely gave Tenley and I a lift so we would only have one car there when the merriment ended in the double digit hours of the night. This gave us several hours to eat and play before donning costumes and trouping to treat stations in the park next door.

It was a grand idea, but Disneyland turned out to be incredibly crowded so we only managed to get on the carousel, the rockets, the teacups and Buzz Lightyear. Tenley also got a nice nap in allowing Jeff and I to have a leisurely lunch at the Hungry Bear.

When D,T &J and C,T &H arrived we all hooked up at Café Orleans, had a great dinner and then made our way through the gathering parade crowd to the Baby Center to change diapers & put on costumes. So we went in with 3 kids, and came out with Elmo, Cinderella and a chicken. On our way out we stopped at the giant Mickey Mouse pumpkin in Town Square to snap a few pictures.

We let the kids run across the plaza and into DCA. While we waited for the rope to drop and Tim changed into his Genie costume, Tenley the Chicken ran all over with her dad chasing her, and James/Elmo took a header and bit his tongue causing us to seek out light and something to staunch the flow of blood.

Eventually we were all fixed up and we headed into the Hollywood Backlot area to begin the marathon crusade to help Doug and Tina acquire enough candy so that they wouldn’t have to buy any to hand out on Halloween night. We only remained with our group for 2 treat stations because Tenley, as usual, had other ideas. Last year, Ten had just started walking and as long as we let her walk she didn’t care what we did. This year, she knows what the rides are and she realized that there are live bands and dance floors. It began with an incessant demand to ride the Monsters Inc. ride- which she loved. By then we had lost everyone, so we set out on our own- this event was about Tenley, not us, so we decided that whatever she wanted to do was fine.

We ran around A Bug’s Land and got some candy before Tenley saw her first band and ran for the dance floor like a moth to a flame. Our little chicken ran right into the middle of the crowd and joined right into the “Hokey Pokey” (which she did remarkably well at). And then she got into “Head Shoulders Knees and Toes” with a little help from the dance hosts. After shaking her little fluffy butt to the “Purple People Eater” we herded her along. Of all the nights not to have the video camera.

Through the magic of cell phones we were able to play Marco Polo with the rest of the gang and meet up on our way to Pacific Wharf . Tenley was utterly fascinated with Tim in the Genie costume and would follow him and wave at him wherever he went. We ditched our group over on the Paradise Pier because Tenley was in awe of the Sun Wheel and kept asking “Ride it? Ride it?” Jeff thought it would be fun to go on the swinging cars, so for the sake of the Kung Pow Chicken I said “ok”. Now if you’ve never seen the Sun Wheel, I should explain that it’s a ginormous ferris wheel with a sun motif built in…and half the cars (the ones that are attached to the sunbeams) slide along them as the wheel goes around. Ugh. I rode with my head buried on Jeff’s shoulder and Tenley pronounced it “scary” on the second time around. King Neptune’s carousel was not scary and earned a “Whee! More??” She wanted to go on the Jumping Jellyfish, but the line was awfully long, and she was really disappointed that we couldn’t go on the rollercoaster.

The only consolation was that the kid has figured out what candy is, and was also happy to go and search for more. We didn’t actually make it to all 13 treat stations which was fine with me because a) there was more than enough candy for a family of 5 or 6 – and I had already unloaded a bunch of it to Doug & Tina, and b) the nice Disney people were being more than accommodating of my love of Tootsie Rolls and Twix.

Possibly the best moment of the night happened as we were making our way out of the park. Ever see a cat chase a flashlight? Picture it with a 2 year old in a chicken costume. There was a moving light that projected Halloween pictures on the ground in various colors. Tenley saw it and spent a good 15 minutes chasing the pictures on the ground all around a five foot area. Again, where was the video camera??? Jeff did get a 15 sec. film of it on his cell phone, and if we can figure out a way to post it we will.

Tenley stopped to get her groove on to “The Monster Mash” and try out a hoola hoop before we left the Treat. We denied her her very favourite ride at Disneyland- the parking lot tram- and instead opted to walk back to the garage. I had remembered to bring her pjs, so we plucked our chicken and sure enough she was out before we were on the fwy.

Next year, we bring the video camera.

See all the pictures at www.jeffandmichelle.net ...just click on photos!

The Tale of the Six Pretzel Fish

The Crime Scene

This morning, Princess Tenley was woken early, taken to fetch visiting Grandma Barbara, and by 11 was back at home running amok while Daddy got ready to go to work and Mommy got ready to take Ten & Grandma Barbara to Village Venture in Claremont.

It was during this, that with her usual lack of spatial awareness, she tripped on her blue snack bowl and spilled 6 pretzel fish. No biggie- but if you don’t pick them up they’ll end up being ground into the carpet, and the 1 survivor will get kicked under the couch where 2 weeks from now it will be “found food” for Tenley to shove in her mouth and cause her dad and I to pry her jaws open to make sure it isn’t money, a rubber band, etc. So in an effort to teach our toddler to be responsible for her actions and to clean up her messes, Daddy called after her and said “Ten, you spilled your fish. Come here and pick them up.” Tenley’s response was to continue what she was doing and to shake her little head as she casually said “no.” He tried again. “Ten, your fish are on the floor- you need to put them back in the bowl.” This time she actually stopped what she was doing to look at him and say “no.” Daddy is the pushover, so Mommy the Evil Authoritarian decided to wade in. “Tenley?” She ignores me. “Tenley! Daddy asked you to pick up your fish. Go put them in the bowl- NOW.” Tenley looked me in the eye, stomped her little foot, and said “NO” and went back to what she was doing. Big mistake.

In a blinding flash of light Mommy the Evil Authoritarian morphed into her stubborn- beyond- reason pale skinned, flame haired Irish ancestors, leapt the kitchen gate, grabbed her by her little arm and said “You do NOT speak to Mommy that way. When Mommy and Daddy ask you to do something, you need to do it!”, then I dragged her to the bowl and said “Now pick up your fish and put them back in the bowl like you were told! We are not going to do anything else until you pick up your fish.”

With that, the lower lip jutted out, the back arched and the 30 minute laying on the floor- kicking- screaming- fist pounding tantrum began.

First there was angry crying and screaming.

Then she decided to try to get Daddy and Grandma to save her. I was proud of them both for telling her “no, I’m not going to cuddle you & save you. You need to pick up your fish.” That produced more tears, fist pounding, and angry roaring.

Her next tactic was distraction. “Wiggles??” “Buzz Lightyear?” “Style?” “Shoes?” “George??” Each of these was asked hopefully, as though we might just want to put in a Wiggles DVD and forget the whole fish thing. But no, each time she was reminded that we were not going to do anything else until she picked up those fish. Cue more wailing and rolling around on the floor in anger.

Sensing that she had done something wrong (although apparently she couldn’t fathom why we were being so mean) she decided to try to use her tears and pitiful state to her advantage. “S-s-sorrrry D-d-daddyyyy” as she crawled over the fish and into his lap. “S-s-s-sorry” Her contrition was spoiled by the fact that as she was hugging Daddy she was trying to get the Lovey out of his back pocket. Daddy hugged her and said, “It’s nice that you’re sorry, but you still need to pick up your fish.” Ack! Foiled again! More angry wailing.

In between bouts of wailing we had tried to play on her sympathies and tell her that the fish were lonely and wanted to be back in the bowl with their friends. We had worked her knowledge of boo-boos by pointing out that they could get stepped on. We pointed out that if left unattended Beeps would eat them. I sang the “Clean it Up” song. George offered to help. Finally we decided to compromise: we would help her put the fish back in the bowl.

The 3 adults sat down on the floor with her, and each picked up one of the 6 wayward fish as we told Tenley we would help her put them away. We told her to pick one up so she could put one in the bowl too. She sat there staring at us. Finally Jeff said, “Ok you can have mine” and he handed her the fish. Which she stuffed into her mouth. We’re all trying desperately not to laugh. Barbara says “Do you want mine?” as Tenley reaches out and snatches the fish and stuffs that in her mouth too. My fish was next. She grabbed 2 more off the floor and stuffed them in. She was determined not to give in- she was NOT going to put those fish back in the bowl like she was told- she would eat them before she put them away!

Unfortunately for Tenley, 5 pretzel fish was her little mouth’s limit. Faced with the inevitable, she finally picked up the 1 remaining fish and dropped it in the bowl. Mommy, Daddy and Grandma cheered like she had just found the cure for cancer. Tenley smiled and laughed sending a spray of salt and crumbs over the former scene of such drama.

The fish finally removed from the floor, we gave her a style and her shoes and got on with our day.

The Drama Queen