About that...

Don’t those puddle jumping pictures look fun?? Here’s the part you didn’t see:

Ten was outside in the rain jumping in the puddles (with Daddy snapping pictures) because we were on our way to Costco. I was put on my jacket and tossed poor Kismet the dog out into the inclement weather because as my friend Kim would say “she’s not trustworthy” to be left in the house. I might have felt bad about this except that just the day before, Jeff’s co-worker Alisa had gifted us with a Kismet sized doghouse that her family no longer needed (thanks Alisa!). Now, did we take the time on sunny Saturday to move the behemoth to a good spot & introduce Kis to it? No way! First I tried just turning it around for her, but the dumb dog was unwilling to walk through the big drips from the eaves to even come near it. So now I am standing in the mud in the steady rain trying to move this thing. Finally I hollered over the gate for Jeff who came over and grabbed a side; and we sloshed and shuffled the thing under the gazebo in the back. Kismet, being a large ferocious looking chicken, ran the far corner of the yard and laid down in the mud. Jeff got a towel for the floor of the doghouse and some treats. I called the dog, who just laid there in the rain and looked at me. I sighed and left the cover of the gazebo to get the big chicken and drag her to the covered house. Drag is the operative word- she has one of those butts that becomes filled with lead, the nose goes up and the legs go stiff. She went so far as to stand on her hind legs and wrap her filthy disgusting paws around my wrist, thereby simultaneously covering my wrist and forearm in mud and soaking it. I successfully got her to the house which she eyed warily, gave a cursory sniff, and then retreated to the center of the yard to lay in the rain and shiver. At that point, we gave up and decided that if she was dumb enough to pass on a warm dry spot, it was out of our hands.

I am now damp all over, muddy in various spots, and my hair- like a 1970’s Pampers diaper- has puffed up to twice it’s normal size. Tenley was mercifully not muddy- but was completely soaked and had somehow managed to get two inches of water in each rain boot.

We trooped back in the house to pony my hair, change my jacket, and completely change Tenley from the waist down. Except that Tenley climbed right into my lap to take her boots off. Now the entire thigh area of my heavy jeans are soaked. So I finish stripping Ten, and take her pants to the dryer while Jeff re-dresses her. I realize as I am walking that my pants are too wet to wear, so I carefully remove them and throw them in the dryer too. I spent the next 10 minutes shivering next to the dryer in nothing but my underwear…and hiking boots.

Finally, Ten was warm and dry, and I was damp but presentable, and we left for Costco…not looking forward to returning home and having to clean up the stupid dog who was still laying in the mud and rain.